Living Longer, Living Better

Dear Friends -

We’re living in a moment no generation before us has experienced. Life expectancy has risen dramatically over the past century, but the real story is that healthy life expectancy has been rising too. Many of us will easily live 20, 30, even 40 more years beyond the traditional retirement age. That’s a second adulthood. And while the financial planning industry has spent decades preparing for this, most people still haven’t designed the life side of that equation.

This is the heart of my work: helping people map out a meaningful third act that isn’t an afterthought but an intentional chapter. If we’re likely to live longer than any prior generation, then making a plan becomes not only smart but necessary.

This week, longevity has been on my mind again thanks to a delightful New York Times interview with Dick Van Dyke, who turns 100 next month and has just published a new book: 100 Rules for Living to 100: An Optimist’s Guide to a Happy Life. It’s filled with simple, joyful, and surprisingly practical advice.

Below are the themes from the article and highlights from his book that I think are worth bringing into our own third-act planning.

Van Dyke goes to the gym three times a week for circuit training. On the off days, he stretches and practices yoga. At times he even dances between machines.
Research backs him up: consistent strength training and mobility work correlate with longer healthspan, better balance, reduced cognitive decline, and slower biological aging.

Takeaway: Movement doesn’t need to be all-or-nothing. It only needs to be consistent, and ideally, playful enough that you look forward to it.

He refuses to become a “get off my lawn” person. Playfulness helps him stay connected to his “inner 15-year-old,” lowers stress, and supports mental well-being.
He finds tiny pockets of playfulness throughout the day: cracking jokes, humming or singing, making a toddler laugh in line at the store.

Takeaway: We often underestimate how much lightness affects longevity. If joy is a skill, it’s one we can keep practicing.

Staying open to new ideas and opportunities—rather than settling into routine—is strongly linked to brain health and emotional resilience. Van Dyke directs children’s theater. He said yes to dancing barefoot in a Coldplay video. He adapts to cultural shifts even when they stretch him.

Takeaway: “Yes” keeps us future-oriented. Novelty is medicine for the brain.

Social connection is one of the most powerful predictors of long life. Van Dyke makes sure his grandkids and great-grandkids have reasons to come over. He sings in a vocal group with men decades younger. He nurtures friendships, stays curious, and invites people into his world.

Takeaway: Building and sustaining relationships in Act Three doesn’t happen by accident. It asks for initiative, creativity, and a willingness to keep showing up.

I pulled early descriptions and interviews around the book to shape this list. These are some of the guiding ideas:

• Stay optimistic on purpose.
He argues that optimism is a habit, not a trait. Much like exercise, it requires daily reps.

• Keep learning.
He writes about the importance of learning new skills well into your nineties. It creates cognitive “spark” and keeps you feeling alive.

• Build routines that feel like anchors.
He talks about simple rituals that add texture to your day—morning music, stretching, short walks, coffee with a friend.

• Maintain curiosity.
Curiosity keeps you from shrinking your world. It also helps you stay adaptable, something he believes is central to aging well.

• Appreciate beauty often.
Sunsets, music, nature, art—small moments that restore your spirit and regulate your nervous system.

• Find meaning in being of service.
He’s clear that having a purpose that involves others—teaching, mentoring, helping—is part of what keeps him vibrant.

• Laugh often, especially at yourself.
Self-deprecating humor keeps the ego flexible and the mood lifted.

Longevity isn’t just about extra years. It’s about extra quality years—and those require intention.

If you’re likely to live into your nineties or beyond, the question becomes:

What do you want life to look like in all those years you’ve worked so hard to create?

Your identity, relationships, purpose, health, and daily rhythms all evolve as you shift out of a career-driven life and into something more self-directed. Having a roadmap makes that transition not just easier but richer.

This is the work I do with clients every day—designing a next chapter that feels energizing, aligned, and personal. Not a retirement from anything, but a move toward something meaningful.

If Dick Van Dyke can turn 100 with joy, flexibility, curiosity, strong relationships, and a touch of mischief, there’s something there for all of us.

What’s one small thing you can say yes to this week?

Warmly,
Cara Gray
Third Act Consultant, CPRC, CEPA

P.S. If you want to start planning your third act, set up a time on my calendar for a chat: Schedule a Chat with Cara