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Dear Friends -
This week I was planning to tell you a story about my 550-square-foot condo. It was a deliberate choice I made ten years ago, right after my divorce. That little space has given me financial freedom and flexibility, and I thought it would be a perfect launch point for a piece about location and how we get to choose where and how we live in our third act.
But as I sat with that story, I realized the real thread underneath it wasn’t location at all. It was freedom. Freedom has been one of my deepest personal values for years. First, it was freedom from a marriage that no longer worked. Then it was freedom from corporate life (I left that world eight years ago). Today, it’s freedom to choose the work I do, the people I do it with and the location I do it from. No surprise, then, that I named my company Good Morning Freedom.
That got me thinking: one of the first exercises I do with clients is to help them identify their core values. And I don’t think I’ve ever really talked about it here. Yet it’s foundational. When you’re clear on your values, you see your life differently. Choices about how to spend your time, who to spend it with, and what to commit to suddenly become less confusing. You stop living by default and start living by design.
From Italy to a Nasdaq Reservation
How do you follow record-setting success? Get stronger. Take Pacaso. Their real estate co-ownership tech set records in Paris and London in 2024. No surprise. Coldwell Banker says 40% of wealthy Americans plan to buy abroad within a year. So adding 10+ new international destinations, including three in Italy, is big. They even reserved the Nasdaq ticker PCSO.
Paid advertisement for Pacaso’s Regulation A offering. Read the offering circular at invest.pacaso.com. Reserving a ticker symbol is not a guarantee that the company will go public. Listing on the NASDAQ is subject to approvals.
Why Values Matter
Think of values as the operating system of your life. They’re not just abstract words on a page—they guide your decisions, big and small. Without them, it’s easy to feel scattered, pulled in a dozen directions, or at the mercy of others’ expectations. With them, you have a compass.
Values help you:
Prioritize time and energy: If “family” is a top value, you won’t feel torn about leaving the office early for a child’s game.
Navigate transitions: Whether retiring, downsizing, or starting a venture, values keep you anchored.
Build resilience: When challenges come (and they always do), values remind you what’s worth fighting for.
Common Examples of Values
Everyone’s list is unique, but here are some that often come up in my work with clients:
Freedom | Family | Creativity |
Adventure | Learning | Growth |
Service | Health | Integrity |
Connection | Community | Contribution |
Curiosity | Spirituality | Joy |
Playfulness | Leadership | Excellence |
Authenticity | Security | Balance |
Compassion | Resilience | Achievement |
Independence | Respect | Love |
Innovation | Simplicity | Courage |
Notice which ones jump out at you. Often your values are hiding in plain sight.
How to Identify Your Values
Here are a few ways to start clarifying your own:
Reflect on peak moments: Think about times in your life when you felt alive, proud, or deeply satisfied. What was present? Connection? Achievement? Playfulness?
Notice what drains you: The opposite of your values can be just as telling. If bureaucracy makes your skin crawl, maybe “autonomy” is one of your values.
Look at your heroes: Who do you admire, and why? Often, the traits you admire most mirror your own core values.
Write your top five: Narrowing it down forces clarity. Five values are much more actionable than fifteen.
Test them: Use them as a lens this week. When an invitation or opportunity comes your way, ask: does this align with my values?
Stories of Living by Values
One of my clients identified “Adventure” and “Learning” as her top values. Instead of retiring quietly, she designed a “mini gap year” for her 60th birthday—taking three months to travel, study art history in Florence, and volunteer at a wildlife refuge in Costa Rica. She came back with more energy for her work than she’d had in years.
Another client’s top value was “Contribution.” Rather than step away completely after selling his business, he now mentors younger entrepreneurs. He’s not doing it for the money, but because it lights him up.
These aren’t just nice stories. They’re proof that when you align your life with your values, your third act feels authentic, not accidental.
Try This AI Prompt
If you want help identifying your values, you can copy and paste this into ChatGPT or another AI tool:
"Help me identify my top personal values. Ask me 10 reflective questions about peak moments, what frustrates me, who I admire, and what gives me energy. Then suggest 5–7 core values that seem to fit my answers, along with short definitions for each."
Bringing It Back to You
Values aren’t something you check off once. They evolve. They deepen. They’re meant to be lived and tested. So here’s my challenge to you this week:
Write down your top five values.
At the end of each day, notice where you lived in alignment—and where you didn’t.
Ask yourself: what one small shift could I make to live closer to my values tomorrow?
Living by your values doesn’t just make decision-making easier. It makes life feel lighter, more aligned, and more meaningful.
So let me ask you: what are your top five values?
Cara Gray
Third Act Consultant, CPRC, CEPA™️
P.S.S. If you want to start planning your third act, set up a time on my calendar for a chat: Schedule a Chat with Cara